Draco Malfoy and a bit of Belladonna
by Scratches
Summary: Draco gets slipped a bit of Belladonna and what kind of crazieness is going to happen in Potions today? insanity, non OOTPHBP compliant


Author- Scratches

Date- February 19, 2002

Disclaimer- I own just the plot. Every thing else is not mine. Im just a crazy Humor/ Parody author that is very broke at the moment.

Pairings- You'll See, You'll see….

A/N- *evil sardonic laugh* 

Draco Malfoy and a bit of Belladonna

Blaise and Jason sat in the back of the potions classroom and where whispering excitedly to each other before the class started. 

"Do you think there is going to be side effects?" Blaise asked her friend.

Jason shook his head vigorously. "The only thing that could go wrong is that he has orange juice at breakfast after he ate the pastry."

Blaise looked at him and questioned, "Then what would happen if that did happen?"

The boy shrugged and smiled wickedly, "Then we'll get to see what happens because it should be kicking in," he looked at his watch, "right about now."

They both watched as a very gleeful Draco Malfoy walked into the Potions room and sat down into the vacant seat next to the famous Harry Potter. "Good morning Potter!" Draco said loudly.

Harry looked quite frightened but kept cool. "Morning?" He said tentatively. 

Draco smiled at every one and winked at Hermione who blushed and giggled.

"Lovely day isn't it Professor?" Draco asked as Snape walked in.

Snape gave Draco and odd look and ask, "You ok there Malfoy?"

Draco smiled widely, "But of course? What would be wrong?"

Snape gave him and odd look before he sat down in the chair behind his desk. "Today we are going to be doing a review of the year for the O.W.L.S. so I hope you are all ready to study." 

As the class quieted down Draco yawned loudly and picked up beaker. He put it in front of Harry and whispered, "Do you Lilac take Harry James Potter to be you lawfully wedded wife?" Under his breath he added, "I do." Turning to Harry who was now looking at him like he was crazy he said, "Do you Harry James Potter take the Lilac to be your lawfully wedded husband?" 

Harry rose his eyebrows and said, "No."

Draco's face fell and he said to 'Lilac', "It'll be all right. No its not you. It's him. He's an ungrateful bastard!"

Blaise and Jason who had herd every thing started to crack up. Draco turned around and picked up a quill that was lying there unused. "Do you, Sean take Blaise Zabini to be you lawfully wedded wife?" Again, under his breath, "I do." To Blaise, "Do you Blaise Avis Zabini take Sean to be your lawfully wedded husband?" 

Blaise gave a short laughed and said, just to make him happy, "I do."

"Now you can kiss the bride." Draco said to his friend and quill. 

Blaise kissed the quill and Draco clapped. "Rha ha! I hope your lives are full of merriment and all that hubbub." 

Now Draco turned to Jason who was looking at the ceiling. Draco's eyes lit up as he saw the green inkbottle on the desk. He went through the whole 'ceremony' and Jason was now married to his inkbottle. 

Draco went around the whole classroom marring people to intimate objects.

And this is who was with what:

Crabbe- his parchment (Bella)

Goyle- his shoe (Jo-anne)

Seamus- his back pack (Ellah)

Dean- his wallet (Marcy)

Millicent Bludstrode- Her lucky rabbits foot. (Bobby)

Lavender Brown- her mascara tube (David)

Pavrati Patil- her hair brush (Justin)

Neville- the spell-o-tape dispenser (Dana)

Sally-Anne Perks- a jar of strawberry jam (Joe)

Ron- his chudley cannon's hey chain (Amanda)

Hermione- her transfiguration book. (Matt)

Harry, who had finally gave in, - Lilac the potions beaker.

Draco bounced up to the teacher's desk and sat on the edge of it looking for something good to marry him to. His eyes spotted a muggle stapler in the corner. Draco picked it up and smiled evilly. 

The class looked on in shock, he was actually going to go through with it!

"Professor, I'd like to introduce you to Shana. Shana, Professor Snape." Draco smiled as he got Snape's attention. 

Snape glared at the boy and then turned his attention to the stapler. What was Draco thinking! Thought Snape. 

"Professor, do you take Shana as your lawfully wedded wife?" Draco asked him seriously.

Narrowing his eyes, Snape asked, "What is wrong with you today Mr. Malfoy?" 

Draco smiled and said again, "Nothing Professor. Why would anything be wrong with me?"

Snape looked at him and stated, "You are under the influence of Belladonna Malfoy."

"I am what? No I am not."

Blaise and Jason looked away and sniggered under their breath. 

"So will you marry Shana?" Draco asked a bit ticked off.

"Sure sure what ever." Snape said while looking through his desk.

"Will you Shana take Snape as your lawfully wedded husband?" Draco looked at the stapler and her said in a high pitched voice, "I doooo!" 

Draco smiled and tapped the professor on the shoulder. "You may kiss the bride now." 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A/N- XD I hope you where laughing! Because it was soooo hard to type this up!

*laughs arse off* 

Okay so the idea was corny but I loved it! I got the idea while listening to Daft Punk.. What techno music does to you! RHA HAHAH!..

Excuse me there….. ^.^;;

Later

Scratches the greatest Humor, Fan Fan Fiction, and Parody author!

Review please!!!

*giggles like mad as Draco marries me to my stereo*

(ps- while I was doing spell check Pavrati came up as "Pervert" *laughs harder*)


End file.
